So, I mostly agree with all this. And, I want to gently push back. One of the ways that I think inequality is perpetuated is in our accepting mediocrity and not pushing for better realities. I see so much communication aimed at privileged folks like me, essentially saying "it's OK, you're going to be privileged no matter what, why not just be more accepting of mediocrity?" But where does that leave people who can't afford mediocrity? We middle class White progressives are happy to debate whether an elite high school should accept an additional 30 kids of color who score high on standardized tests, but what about the 3,000 kids of color who didn't? They live nearby to working class families whose kids will indeed get a good education, and whose economic prospects are much brighter; are the parents deliberately deciding not to do what those families do? Are we as a society deciding that? Are we just letting it happen, not wanting to be impolite? I know I'm being judgmental when I see a parent letting their toddler watch Netflix on a phone, and there isn't comprehensive evidence proving worst outcomes for kids who zone out at younger ages, but I think those aren't good reasons to stop making the case that parents shouldn't do that. Heck, schools shouldn't do that -- twice, during scheduled school tour days at Brooklyn public schools, the parent coordinator has scrambled to explain away the fact that the kids are watching a movie (and not an educational one). I've seen an overwhelmed teacher turn on Spongebob to keep a classroom quiet for an hour, during an academic period. I kinda do think we need to be jerks about this kind of thing more, to be less reasonable and less accommodating. These media companies have millionaire marketers and content strategists using all their Harvard Business School expertise to wring attention out of our kids. Sure, our kids can take the hit. But should they? Should we? And can other kids take it?
I loved this. And, I have thought about this question (kids/screens/my household/screens etc) a lot. Really, for me, it has come down to the same thing re: the kids which is, how do they seem? Yes, they have screens, yes they do seem to be a way to retreat (from big lives and big schedules where they interact, join clubs, take on leadership positions and play sports). So, for me, this really resonated b/c the only place I can really rest in it is how do they seem when they are in their lives? Connected? Calm? Happy? Engaged? This was so helpful. Thank you.
I grew up without a TV (in the true 80s sense of no TV) and I still sometimes feel like an alien because I am missing all of the cultural references from the first two decades of my life. Got one after college and never looked back. Zero qualms about letting my kids watch TV except that I’m very tired of constantly dissecting character motivations for all the various Toy Story toys. Can’t wait till they graduate to The Wire so I can actually enjoy our discussions.
Wow, one of those pieces where you name a thing that's been sort of floating around in my semi-conscious, or like five things, and then thread them altogether with humor and wisdom and nostalgia and hopefulness (not the annoying kind, but the breathe easier kind). What a gift.
Love love LOVE Bluey. It's hard to explain how well they balance entertainment for kids with larger discussions of complicated human relationships. Was just watching Double Babysitter last night that was a story about childhood trust in grownups AND being willing to take risks in love at any age. Hoo boy I'd better stop now because I can go on got ages about this show
So, I mostly agree with all this. And, I want to gently push back. One of the ways that I think inequality is perpetuated is in our accepting mediocrity and not pushing for better realities. I see so much communication aimed at privileged folks like me, essentially saying "it's OK, you're going to be privileged no matter what, why not just be more accepting of mediocrity?" But where does that leave people who can't afford mediocrity? We middle class White progressives are happy to debate whether an elite high school should accept an additional 30 kids of color who score high on standardized tests, but what about the 3,000 kids of color who didn't? They live nearby to working class families whose kids will indeed get a good education, and whose economic prospects are much brighter; are the parents deliberately deciding not to do what those families do? Are we as a society deciding that? Are we just letting it happen, not wanting to be impolite? I know I'm being judgmental when I see a parent letting their toddler watch Netflix on a phone, and there isn't comprehensive evidence proving worst outcomes for kids who zone out at younger ages, but I think those aren't good reasons to stop making the case that parents shouldn't do that. Heck, schools shouldn't do that -- twice, during scheduled school tour days at Brooklyn public schools, the parent coordinator has scrambled to explain away the fact that the kids are watching a movie (and not an educational one). I've seen an overwhelmed teacher turn on Spongebob to keep a classroom quiet for an hour, during an academic period. I kinda do think we need to be jerks about this kind of thing more, to be less reasonable and less accommodating. These media companies have millionaire marketers and content strategists using all their Harvard Business School expertise to wring attention out of our kids. Sure, our kids can take the hit. But should they? Should we? And can other kids take it?
I loved this. And, I have thought about this question (kids/screens/my household/screens etc) a lot. Really, for me, it has come down to the same thing re: the kids which is, how do they seem? Yes, they have screens, yes they do seem to be a way to retreat (from big lives and big schedules where they interact, join clubs, take on leadership positions and play sports). So, for me, this really resonated b/c the only place I can really rest in it is how do they seem when they are in their lives? Connected? Calm? Happy? Engaged? This was so helpful. Thank you.
I grew up without a TV (in the true 80s sense of no TV) and I still sometimes feel like an alien because I am missing all of the cultural references from the first two decades of my life. Got one after college and never looked back. Zero qualms about letting my kids watch TV except that I’m very tired of constantly dissecting character motivations for all the various Toy Story toys. Can’t wait till they graduate to The Wire so I can actually enjoy our discussions.
Wow, one of those pieces where you name a thing that's been sort of floating around in my semi-conscious, or like five things, and then thread them altogether with humor and wisdom and nostalgia and hopefulness (not the annoying kind, but the breathe easier kind). What a gift.
Love love LOVE Bluey. It's hard to explain how well they balance entertainment for kids with larger discussions of complicated human relationships. Was just watching Double Babysitter last night that was a story about childhood trust in grownups AND being willing to take risks in love at any age. Hoo boy I'd better stop now because I can go on got ages about this show